Our FASD Journey
My name is Laura Bedard. I work alongside Kristen Eriksen at massFAS. I wanted to tell you a bit about our FASD journey and how I got to be co-coordinator at massFAS. First of all, I am an artist. I have a master's degree in Fine Arts. Years ago, I was working in museums and teaching art at local colleges.
I thought that was important to me, until I met Enid Watson at massFAS. Helping families and advocating for FASD has become a major part of my life and I love it.
After getting married and having our daughter, my husband and I decided to adopt. Our son, who is now 8, was adopted at birth through a private adoption.
Our son was born prematurely and was in the NICU. When I saw him for the first time he was connected to all kinds of wires, a feeding tube and oxygen. Thankfully, every day he did better and wires and feeding tube disappeared. Once we got him home, we noticed sleeping issues. By 15 month he was showing delays with motor skills and speech. We did early intervention, private speech therapy and sensory processing therapy. Within a couple of years, we saw aggression and anxiety. The aggression picked up to a point where we needed to get outside help. We had no idea what was going on. Was this the beginnings of a mental illness? His birth mother told us she did not use drugs while pregnant and there was no family history of mental illness. Why is he becoming so violent and angry?
As the aggression got worse, learning, memory and behavior issues began to arise in school.
Getting a diagnosis was not easy. First he was diagnosed with Autism, but we knew there was something else. Two years ago, he was diagnosed with Partial FAS. After years of searching for answers, we felt some relief. All these puzzle pieces fit together. Great, we have a diagnosis, let's fix it! Unforturnally FASD does not work that way. There is no cure. Sadly, in the United States, Massachusetts has limited to no support for families and adults with FASD. Our in-home therapists have said that they never worked with anyone with FASD. They would go home and google FASD before coming back to the house. Our pediatrician told me “I have not seen FASD in 40 years.” It was like being on an island. No one got it. No one understood what it was like day after day.
After searching for help online I found massFAS and I met Enid Watson over a year ago. She was the first person who understood what it was like to care for someone with FASD. I suddenly didn’t feel alone. We talked for a while and she connected me with Kristen. She was the first mom I spoke to who had children with an FASD. “She gets it too!” I thought.
Since Massachusetts did not have an FASD support group for parents and caregivers, Kristen and I got together and started one through massFAS. We have a wonderful group of moms who join every week. We all get it. We all get each other. We can talk about our week and share resources.
When Enid told us she was retiring Kristen and I were in shock. I just found Enid and this wonderful community; she cannot leave! Kristen and I knew we needed to step in. Enid has done an amazing job raising awareness in Massachusetts and supporting parents. I hope we can at least take over for her. We want to reach as many people as possible about FASD. massFAS will continue to educate and support Massachusetts.
Today our son loves his in-home therapist. He is making friends at school and LOVES his Legos. Our daughter is struggling at times. It’s difficult dealing with a sibling you can’t understand and who is unpredictable. (that’s a topic for another discussion) But we are progressing.
Things at home are far from perfect, but we are doing our best. Two years ago, I felt like I was alone on an island, but I know I am not alone. We are in this together and we will raise awareness, get more supports in place and help people and families in Massachusetts affected by or raising children with FASD.